So lately, due to several different people and different events, I’ve been thinking a lot about entitlement.
It’s Stewardship season at church, and the theme is “Count Yourself Blessed.” This month, I’m really trying to focus on this… because really, every day I thank my lucky stars for what I’ve been blessed with in this life, especially in this crazy time of transition for me. But then I heard an especially poignant sermon from Pastor Nicolette where she talked the idea of what in this life we really earn. This, coupled with an awesome facebook status by the great Courtney Self, and the old-man grumbings of one Ryan Fuller about the Occupy Wall Street talk and the idea to forgive student loans, got my head spinning.
Lets start with Ryan. I reposted the “forgive student loans” link on my status, as kind of a pipe-dream idea. What I wouldn’t give to not have to pay back my approximately $75,000 worth of loans— I’d be able to move out of my parents’ house, actually save some money, and move on with my life. Then Ryan commented, bringing up points of a) we all knew what we were getting into when we took out these loans and b) if loans are forgiven, they don’t just disappear, someone has to pay for them. While my first reaction was CYBERBULLY! once I thought about it I realized he has a good point. And like I said I don’t really expect to get out of these loans, but I should think about what my facebook statuses portray. But he’s totally right, I took out the loans to get a Master’s Degree. I knew I’d have to pay them back, and a loan is a loan regardless of the purpose and the lender.
This segues into Courtney’s status: Thought for the day: Always check yourself when you feel entitled. I always have to remind myself I am not owed anything in this life. Even when I earn it, I still may not get it, and am not owed it. Besides, most of the time I never really “earn” the things I feel I am “owed”.
Sometimes I get really carried away with the frustrations about my current situation. And I admit to having feelings of “well I worked really hard for this Master’s degree, something should result from it!” Something did result from it- I walked away with a honed set of skills that I can use (and am using) to pursue a career in music. Yes, it did get me a hefty student loan (and a maxed out credit card to match), but I more or less knew that going in. So, for the next few years I’m gonna have to work my butt of to save money. I’m going to have to keep my job at Red Robin, though I’d rather quit, for the extra cash. But I have an advanced degree that I’m HELLA-proud of. Not to mention I had an AMAZING two years of priceless experiences and a list of life-long friendships.
And lastly on to Pastor Nicolette’s sermon: the topic was something to do about how what’s yours is also God’s. She brought up the point that in one light, she “earned” her degrees by working hard. But, in reality, she was lucky enough to be born in a country where higher education was easily accessible. And this is probably my biggest problem. Too often I think “well I worked three jobs, took a full class load, and was a member of several performing ensembles every semester in undergrad. Then in grad school, I worked a nearly full time job to make up for the fact that I as paying out of state tuition with no assistantship, and it was still never enough” Now it’s a time to step back and reevaluate that state of mind. Like PN, I was fortunate enough to be born in a country, state, and town where higher education was available. I was lucky enough to be born into a family where education was always important, and not going to college was not an option. I was lucky enough to be blessed with a gift for music that allowed me to be accepted into both my undergrad and graduate programs. I AM blessed enough to have parents who have supported me every step of the way, not only emotionally but financially when needed (and continue to). And yes, I did work hard, and plan to continue to work hard, but that doesn’t give me the right to have a sense of entitlement for anything I might “deserve.”
There has just been so much talk about what people deserve on facebook and in the news (especially with the Occupy Wall Street issues at hand) that I’ve been thinking A LOT about this. So I’m going to continue to count myself blessed this month (and beyond) and really keep myself in check.
Slices of life.
